MEAT

I make fun of newly acquired husband a lot for his protein intake obsession. I make fun of a lot of obsessions of his which is a post that may never get posted. In any case let it be known that according to him, steak & eggs is what it's all about. They do not need to occur together but they need to occur frequently for reasons he can explain to you.

With my crippled status dominating my little life, (an unfortunate fact, but one that I will milk for all it's worth, yes, thank you very much for asking), I am learning to tune the google-verse to cater to my new interests and sure enough she told me that I can speed up the healing process by falling in line with newly acquired husband's opinions because, don't you know, a diet rich in protein will fuse muscles and things around bones. Maybe not, but who knows. Having the google-verse side with newly acquired husband even though newly acquired husband probably had no idea about this, is a bit upsetting and while it could be convenient in theory, it is not because he is in Argentina, where beef is a vegetable and I am, last I checked, not there at all, but instead stranded on mad cow island. Besides obviously oozing of unfairness, it also means that I am carnevoiring it out all by myself and on a daily basis I dutifully trek to my local halal butcher. The man loves me. He must think he single handedly converted me to cow eating because I appeared one day out of nowhere and now just can't get enough. Won't he be sad when I am back to wine and cheese, which is pretty much all I normally eat.

Given that I have nothing else to do, I am observing something strange happening the past couple of weeks. Other than meat eating, I make sure to do as little as humanly possible. I also stay clear of the sweet sweet wine due to that little rumor about liver or kidney or some sort of damage that booze and pain killers together apparently bring about. No wine, no cheese, no exercise and large chunks of bloody meat and I am feeling skinnier than ever. Not that I have access to a scale cause the closest one is tucked away in the gym, which obviously is dangerous ground that must be avoided at all costs, but yes, turns out eating meat and lots of it makes you feel skinny, that must be what Mr. Atkins found out many decades before me.

Necessity IS the mother of invention or did I just re-invent the wheel?