Anxiously awaiting Anxiety

I don't know WHY I get all anxious about things I am not actually that anxious about. It's a weird self-fulfilling prophecy. I think I will get nervous, because it's something really really important, and then I get all nervous about getting nervous and which point when the really really important thing happens I am all nervous.

And all for nothing. Had this looming chat with the not at all scary boss on the horizon in which I wanted to flag a few thing that are very important to me, such as my dissatisfaction about my current location and wanted to finagle a thin line between a bunch of other things on the wish list. I got a maybe, which is fabulous, except now I have to wait more and I just want to know cause nothing makes me more anxious than not knowing. Like if the maybe is more like a maybe not I want to be writing application letters to Asian fetish store owners about being a salesgirl/photographer asap and if the maybe is something like a maybe in one year, I am getting all anxious again about having to have another conversation which is really important which is what maybe I should have talked about in the first place today, which would just put an end to the whole waiting bit and worse yet, just in case the maybe turns into a yes, I am getting all anxious already about having to do some hard-ass negotiating of several not all too popular requests (is a sabbatical after one year on the job really that outrageous?).