MRS

It appears that the English way of welcoming back a newly married gal is to ask her how it feels being a Mrs. This is distinctly different from the US way, which in itself nuanced ranges from "how is the old ball and chain?" (Texas), "May your honeymoon never end" (Florida), "You got married?????????" (Boston), "When are you going to start making babies?" (cross-regional).

I can handle being a Mrs, it oozes gravitas and makes me laugh at the same time while turning around to see who that person is they are talking to. Surely I will grow up one day, but what I really want to know is what comes after the Mrs? I am a Mrs of who? Given that my last name stayed with me, am I Mrs. B? My mother?

Let me digress for a moment. In Spanish culture there is a beautiful old fashioned way to make it equally obvious to men and women that other men and women are available or unavailable, lets make this more clear, unmarried or married, married by no means meaning unavailable, especially not in Spain. The male species in its married form is called senor and the female senora. The unmarried form for the former is, oh surprise, senor and the latter, senorita. But it has not always been this way. There is a senorito. Well, there was. Why, in this already confusing day and age of wedding ring optionality (for men - it appears that girls are more into jewels or how should I interpret this?), would one also take away the senorito? I have an idea: maybe that way nobody, or no womanbody, may have the wisdom to tell the difference? Nah, not likely.

Back on track. In Spanish culture there is also a beautiful way of knowing whose Mrs. one is. One is the Mrs. of one's Daddy and Mommy in that particular order without becoming one's Mommy by default. Wonderful. One is born with a name that is a combination of Daddy's first last name and Mommy's first last name, thus, voila, making a uniquely named little person, who if female may or may not make that transition from senorita to senora, but regardless never having to change her initials or turning into her own mother. Or anyone else's mother. And that, with all due respect is a good thing.